Postpartum Recovery: Nourishing & Honoring Your Body with Shelby Payne | 171

Full of recalibration of your body, your mind, your emotions rooted in Chinese medicine, nutrition, and emotional healing. Shelby knows what it feels like to be stretched thin, to wonder if you'll ever feel like yourself again, to wake up carrying the anxiety and the overwhelm. And she's here to tell you, it doesn't have to be that way.

So let's dive in.

Good morning everyone. So Shelby and I are going to be talking about postpartum, but Shelby is going to bring something different, I think, than most of you guys have heard. And we're gonna be talking about what makes Shelby's program different and why she's so passionate about postpartum. So I would love to say hello and welcome.

Thank you. Hello. And I want you just to tell everyone your journey to where you are now and why you're doing what you're doing.

I had digestive issues when I was very young. That developed into eating disorders, and emotional, deep emotional issues. So then when I, when I went to college, I was like, okay, I'm on my own. I'm going to eat healthy. Low fat, everything. I'm gonna go vegetarian, I'm gonna go vegan, all raw, you know? And I So from

Trish: Fried food to low fat, nothing.

And at that point I had been working with a Western herbalist and a Chinese herbalist. And so. My perspective on things had changed tremendously. And when my son came, I realized that things looked different for me. I was struggling emotionally from a traumatic birth and some other things that were happening in my life at the time, but physically I was coming back online a lot quicker than I was told to expect a lot quicker than I had seen friends come back online.

And so. I took this, this feeling I was having of wanting to help just tell my friends, like, if you just did this, if you, if you shifted this a little bit, you know, you would feel so much better. And it turned into a business idea and I got more passionate about it along the way. And so here I

Trish: am.

Shelby: means I, I had the energy to get up and play.

I had, I wasn't breaking down every day. I mean, yes, I was dealing with emotional, fatigue or crying spurts, every now and then because of what had happened. And I feel like in postpartum, you can tell when someone is deeply depressed when someone is deficient because they don't wanna get up, they cry, they're angry.

Mm-hmm.

Trish: So what were you doing different? Give us just a couple little tidbits.

Shelby: I had worked on my mindset. I. For a long time I kept a journal since I was as little as I can remember, and I think having that outlet is so relieving, is so therapeutic. I. And just being able to write down how you're feeling every day, what's going on.

Because postpartum is very isolating you, you don't have a lot of people all the time. We don't have a village. If your mom's around, that's a blessing. Mm-hmm. And so having that journal, yeah, yeah. Having that journal, having a place to confide when no one else is listening is super important. The other aspect of that is the internal, what are you putting into your body?

Trish: I think it's, so, you know, you and I both, I'm from Florida, but my parents are from Kentucky and Tennessee.

So I feel like I was raised in the deep South and I grew up in Tennessee 'cause I moved here when I was 21, so you'll appreciate this. But I think a lot of people in the South, especially when you say Chinese medicine and they're like, oh, it's woo woo, but you are talking about nutrition and I feel like it's so.

Mm-hmm. And my husband is really, really into all of that as well. And I'm not gonna say I am the best eater in the world, but I am very conscious of what I eat.

Shelby: Mm-hmm.

Trish: I just, I want everyone listening. If hearing Chinese medicine triggered in you like, oh, it's gonna be woo woo, I want you to hear me.

Like we're talking about the basics. Yes. And we know that for our babies, like we wouldn't put a bunch of weird stuff in our babies. Like we know what they need, whether you're formula feeding or breastfeeding. We're gonna put a lot of thought in it and make sure it's healthy for them, and we are valuable.

As moms

When the baby sleeps, do not get out of bed. They don't even want you washing your hair because when you wash your hair, the wetness, when it evaporates, can allow. Your heat, your energy to escape. So it's really going back to, like you said, the basics. We are nourishing and preserving our bodies.

Trish: What's interesting is that most other cultures, they go by that in some form of fashion.

Mm-hmm. Besides us here in America. Yes. Now I know that. Some of the bougie girls like myself when you, although I don't wash my hair super often, but 40 days might be pushing it.

Shelby: Yes. We have blow dryers now. It's, it's a little different now.

Yes. And I've gone on, I've gone on mission trips before where for a few weeks and to countries that. They have water shortages so we don't wash our hair. And it like, I like had natural pomade, like my hair could like be poofed so big. But I love, we teach our students the 5 5, 5 method for postpartum where they're five days in the bed, five days on the bed, five days near the bed.

Shelby: Mm-hmm.

Trish: And that is hard to convince them to do. Yes.

Shelby: Yes. Extremely. I mean, we live in a society that is go, go, go. If you're not accomplishing something, if you're not doing something, something's wrong.

Trish: Which is really funny when you say it that way because you're literally building and then nourishing another human being.

Yes. Like that is as That is accomplished as you can get.

Trish: Mm-hmm. Yeah. I agree with that. And that's one thing that I teach my girls as well is that you get your one space that you're gonna be in a lot.

Really zen. Make sure it's clean and organized. 'cause I know myself, if I'm looking at some clutter or I'm gonna get up, I, no matter what, I'm gonna fix it. Yes. Like I'm gonna, so we get that done before baby comes, have all your stuff conveniently organized, have the important things, and then divvy out those jobs to people.

And I'm a mom who has grown kids, so I can say 100%, like let the dishes go. But that is hard to do when you're in the midst of it.

Shelby: Yes, it is. It is. Because you're so sensitive at that time. I mean, you feel raw. You've just been basically ripped open. Like everything from your inside is now outside, and that vulnerability, that openness, anything can set you off.

Trish: Yeah, and I, and I think we also have to acknowledge the fact that you've been in this body your whole life and now it's completely foreign and different and doing weird stuff, which it does during postpartum

Yes it does. And that in itself, like, I don't think enough people. Prepare moms for, your body is so foreign to you, and that is such a weird feeling and emotions to go through. Mm-hmm. So I love that. So do you teach moms, like the nutritional side of it? Tell me what you, teach them.

If you had a mom working with you, like what do you guys do together?

Shelby: So when a mom joins any program, if we do a one-on-one session, if we go into a deeper, one month or three month, container, I don't normally teach, I just give them what they need. Because that teaching, can you guide them, right?

And I think that that's really relieving for moms because like we said, there's so much going on. So much in their bodies outside around them. People are coming in and out. The house isn't like they want it, their body's not like they want it. Everything is just off. And if they have a plan, if they just have a step by step by step, what do I do in the morning?

What do I do in the afternoon? What do I do in the evening? Okay. Yeah.

For sure, for sure. I love that. And so you incorporate all of that to where they can have helpers? 'cause I feel like that's the most important thing and, and again, other cultures. Mm-hmm. The village comes in and takes care of the mom. Yeah. It's just so insane to me how it is in the us. Like I know, especially for my C-section moms too, to add that in.

They've had major abdominal surgery. And now they're expected to do all the things and care for another human.

Shelby: Yes. Yes. It's, it's shocking. It's like, and it's like you said, especially for people, for women who are having a second or third or fourth, they're coming home to a chaotic house. They're not gonna go home and rest.

They're not gonna go home and take that time for themselves.

Trish: I have a question for you.

Shelby: 10 p.

10 P is aged tangerine peel. It's basically. Orange peel that has been, dried and aged. It helps with digestion. And digestion is so weak postpartum. Our body is not focused on it. That's why we focus on the most soothing foods that we can. So Chen, C-H-E-N-P-I. If you wanna look it up, I'm so

Trish: glad you spelled it.

I was gonna ask you. Thank you. Okay, so chenpi is one, chenpi

Trish: Okay.

And I'm gonna link to Shelby's Instagram. If you guys have any questions, you can always shoot her a DM and she can give you more, details. 'cause this is obviously not my zone of genius, but I am really fascinated and I wish that I could, I I had been more focused on what I was putting into my body postpartum.

'cause I feel like I was of the mind of like, if I can get anything in, I'm good. If I can just get something in, I was not intentional at all. And I want you guys to really hear me. Your body has built a human and then you birthed a human and you need to honor it. And part of honoring our bodies, you know, and for my Christian girls listening, we, we say that our body is the temple.

Or you hear, oh, your body's the temple, and you're like, oh my gosh, it's a Christian girl. Either way, no matter where you're coming from. The truth of the matter is our bodies are insanely incredibly amazing and we should be honoring it. And I'm at the other end of the spectrum, y'all. I'm in my early fifties now, which I hate to say it, but I'm realizing Thank you.

I am realizing now that all of those skipped meals and all of the time that I was so worried about fitting into those jeans so I could look cute was stupid. I should have been honoring this body. And I remember when I was really young, my mom telling me, now let me just say my mom is like extremely unhealthy when it comes to eating and body image.

I wish I would've listened to that Shelby that day saying to do these things, it's so important and honor this, this body. I really wish our society in general, 'cause I know other cultures do like. It's some alien weird stuff going on. We are building actual human beings.

Shelby: It is.

It's amazing.

Trish: Like an actual person who could become the president one day. Yes. And yet we're like, oh, they need to eat or they need to sleep, or they need to do this. I'll eat a meal later. I'll grab a bar here, I'll do that. We're not honoring this freaking body and we're not teaching our daughters to do that either, or our sons that.

Their wives bodies need to be honored and we gotta change. It stops now. I agree.

Yes. That that creates this, this being from us, from what is within us. And so that concept of being depleted afterwards and rebuilding and being intentional, this is. Straight from your body. This is created from you. It's growing itself. Now let, let me interrupt

Trish: for a second because you guys can't see what I'm seeing unless we, we might use this part as video if that's okay for you because it's so beautiful.

Sure. As Shelby's talking, because the way I roll around here and I, I told Shelby in my coaching in labor, nurse mama with my. With my doulas who work for me. Family is priority, and your babies are always welcome. So Shelby has her baby, and her baby just walked up and as she's saying that we do this naturally.

And my switch went to off and I. I immediately, I was in therapy. I'd been in therapy, he had a traumatic brain injury. It's a long, long story, but I've been in therapy consistently since 20 14, 20 15, learning how to deal with this new person, and my therapist suggested that I went to a boundaries class.

I legit. And some of you guys were like, probably some of you guys are like, oh my God, I can't believe she had to question that. And then there's the other group of you who were like me who were like, oh, you can do that. And I remember my kids being so like confused by my new boundaries. Now they respect them, but I didn't respect myself and I didn't respect my own boundaries.

And so I did not teach them that. I had a right to A, B, or C, and so it's been a real, like I'm tearing up a little because my children have watched me grow. They've watched me build this business and impact other women and, and change my life, but they've also, I. Been really proud of me that I've stood up for myself.

I don't know where this emotion's coming from, but one of the most profound things that you can do as a mom is to honor you and model that for your children. And that starts with what we put inside of us. And we don't skip meals and we don't hurry and make sure they have what they want and we don't Like that is not honoring you.

Shelby: Yeah. I mean, we, we are their source of everything. We're their source of emotional regulation, their source of nourishment. And if we don't have that for ourselves, we can't give it. And I think that's really important what you're saying.

Trish: Yeah, I'm loving this because her little one is pointing at her cheek, I can't see him.

Whether she's postpartum, whether she's trying to conceive what is one little nutritional. Thing that you would say, like one thing she could add in that would really help her besides the herbs, like food wise, easy. 'cause some people like trying to find those herbs might be more work than they have inside of them right now.

Yes. Yeah, for sure. I would say just

Shelby: start with breakfast. And I don't mean a biscuit with jam or a piece of toast. I mean have some eggs and bacon. Make some bone broth that if you could make anything, if you could spend some time and make anything, make bone broth, why, but make sure that you have a good breakfast.

Trish: You're alive. Okay, so you don't know me well enough to know that I can't even touch chicken to cook it or like my husband has to like do, I'm not, I, I grew up before I got pregnant young, but up until I got pregnant, which I got pregnant at 17, I did not eat meat at all. Like I would order hamburger from McDonald's with no hamburger because the thought of eating animal like.

Freaked me out. And so when you are saying you, I'm assuming you're meaning, make it yourself.

Shelby: Make it. Because if you buy it from the store there, it, it doesn't have fast. They've taken all the stuff

Trish: out. Right. It's,

Shelby: it's very basic. So explain what you buy the whole process. I buy Uhhuh, I buy any kind of meat that still has a bone in it.

Why ginger? 12 For inflammation or it increases circulation? Yeah. Okay. It, it, it warms the body, increases circulation and enhances healing.

Trish: Okay. All right. So all of y'all, I'm gonna try it. You guys try it. Okay, good. How long do you put it in the

Shelby: crockpot? Like all day, 12 to 24 hours. I, I leave it in overnight.

Okay, interesting. And like on low, what? Yes. On low. Okay. I, so I, I put my lamb in there last night. I put ginger salt vinegar and left it until noon the next day.

Trish: Okay. All right. And then you get rid of the meat, or do you eat that too?

Trish: Okay. So the broth, it makes quite a bit, I'm assuming, like how long do you store it in the fridge? Like how long does it

Shelby: Yes, I, I collect jars. I think most moms collect jars at this point, so I just fill up my jars and keep them in the fridge. If it's got a good fat layer on it, it'll keep it for maybe two weeks at a time.

Trish: So, you mean in the fridge, whatever you're storing it in, it'll have that fat layer on the top like gravy? Yes. Yes. Like gravy does that too. And that, and then do, do you heat it up? Yeah. Yes. To drink it for sure. Just drink it

Shelby: like a drink. You can. If you like it, if you like it, but if you don't mix it into things that you're already making, make a soup with it.

You can make egg pudding with it. I do poached eggs. What is egg

Trish: pudding?

Shelby: Egg pudding is

Trish: I.

My oldest daughter used to do all the, the touching of the meat stuff because it freaks me out. Okay, go ahead. So what is egg pudding? Is anybody else thinking that too? I think they are.

Shelby: Egg pudding can be, you can make it sweet or savory, but basically you, you just whip your eggs really well. You can use a blender or just whip them really well and you double

boil them on the stove. So like you have a pot of water and then you put your bowl Okay. In that pot. So, got it. But you can use bone broth as your, as your liquid. You can use cream.

Trish: Okay. And what's the goodness of this? 'cause I'm not sure about this.

Shelby: Eggs are extremely nourishing. It's just, I mean, I like

Trish: eggs.

I just have not done it that way.

Trish: Okay, well maybe I just need a different name than egg pudding. I don't know.

Shelby: Maybe so, maybe so we could call it like pudding or something.

Egg fluff

Trish: or

Shelby: something?

Trish: Yeah. Fluffy eggs. Okay. So this has been so interesting and I'm so happy that we talked about this and if you guys want to find Shelby, tell them where they can find you and what all that you have to offer them.

Shelby: Okay. Intentionally postpartum on Instagram. That's, that's where I'm at.

And I do, if you, if you want tips, if you want anything like that, I do a free mini intake form where I basically give you three tips to move forward. You fill out a small form and it gives me based on her to go on. Yes. Okay. Completely personalized.

Trish: Okay. Which is exactly what we need in all form of maternity care, is individualized care, not just what the masks should do.

Shelby: I, I totally enjoyed it. I appreciate you inviting me.

Trish: Wow. That conversation was. A little bit of a wake up call. So if you've been running on empty, ignoring your needs or pushing through when your body is begging you to slow down, this is your permission slip girl. You don't have to earn rest. You don't have to justify your boundaries. You don't have to wait until you've bounced back to start honoring yourself.

And as Shelby and I talk today, it starts now your healing, your peace, your power. Let's as moms decide to stop surviving and start reclaiming what motherhood can be. When you're supported, you're seen in your whole. So I would challenge you. First subscribe and leave a review, and I want you to write in the review how you're gonna honor yourself today.