An Unscheduled Urgent C-section: Kayla’s Birth Story from Preeclampsia, Induction and More | 64

Kayla's birth story 


I'm here to help you take the guesswork out of childbirth so you can make the choices that are right for you and your baby. Quick note, this podcast is for educational purposes only and does not replace your medical advice. Check out our full disclaimer at the bottom 


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Kayla: I am too. It's a long time coming. I know you were supposed to do this before and I had to push it back, but I'm ready. Yes, 


Trish: I am. I'm so glad and I know that. I know this has been a little bit hard for you to be here today, so I just want to tell everyone that It's taken a lot of courage for Kayla to come today and her birth story is not gonna be, a perfect birth story to listen to, but not everybody's gonna have, that picture perfect birth story. 


And that's what I hope we've done with you. So I wanna share your story today. 


Kayla: Yeah. Thank you. I I definitely have felt the love since everything. I guess I'll dive right in. 


Trish: Yeah. So let's go back. Yeah. Let's talk about you and Steve. Let's talk about your journey to getting pregnant and finding us and all of the, all the 


Kayla: things. 


I got my first period in December and I started tracking my ovulation and whatnot. And in January I knew I was d my period was due and I was mentally prepared that it was gonna take a few tries. That the percentage of people, couples who try to get pregnant. The percentage out the gate that it's successful on the first try is really low. 


I came running outta the bathroom and I'm, I started crying and I'm like, it's positive. It's positive. And he, at first he didn't realize like what I was saying. And then he saw the test in my hand and he looked at me and he's oh my oh my God. It's positive. So I. Was obviously, oh, we were overjoyed. 


I was shocked that it happened so quickly for us. I was not expecting that. I loved being pregnant. My pregnancy was amazing. I have no complaints over my pregnancy. First, obviously first trimester is not anything beautiful or wonderful, but I got through that and I, I did, I love being pregnant. 


It was, I know that's not a very popular opinion. All my friends, they hated it. Yeah, I did. I really did. Yeah. 


My 39 week appointment it was a Monday, I like, I'll never forget the day of the week. It was a Monday and I went in, I had an N S T that Friday before. And I went in to see my doctor and, Baby's heart rate was doing great, but the swelling, was I can't remember what he said. I think there was a number rating. 


Trish: Yeah, I remember you were having like tingling and numbness and Yeah. 


So at this appointment he mentioned the possibility of having to look at being induced. And I love my ob. He was my, our story aside, my OB was amazing throughout my entire pregnancy and has been an amazing support person after And he, he said, I don't wanna induce you either. If you can go into labor naturally, I would prefer that. 


But let's give it a few days and see what your body does. But I couldn't do curb walking. I couldn't do certain things because of the swelling. So I had to find other things to do bounce on the ball or Steve and I tried doing it the old fashioned way and to see if we could kickstart it that way. 


Trish: having some blood pressure stuff too, 


Kayla: right? Yeah. Yeah. That's why I was going in. Besides the swelling. Yeah. That's why the NST started being. Weekly because I was having, yeah. 


My blood pressure had started going up. Yeah. So Wednesday, the September 28th that was what we agreed on. If by the 28th, if by Wednesday if I didn't go into labor naturally, I was gonna go to, get the fully bulb inserted. Yeah. Yeah. So we went to the hospital. I didn't realize that I was actually gonna be getting admitted that day. 


The bulb, my blood pressure, it was high. Again, it wasn't like emergent, but it was high. They wanted to keep it. Yeah, 


Trish: yeah. I think I remember it was like one 40 s or high one 30 s or something. Yeah, 


Kayla: yeah. Yep. They, so I got, I did all the paperwork. I got admitted, they placed the bulb sometime Wednesday evening. 


And which was 


Trish: good that you were somewhat open. 


Kayla: Yeah, I was I, if I recall correctly, I wanna say they were saying it was about two centimeters. This is great. I baby was at a negative three. Negative three. So baby was not dropped at all. Yeah. And only, I think like 20%, maybe 40% a face like cervix was definitely not ready. 


They gave me some nausea medicine so I could sleep because the bulb was in for 12 hours. So it was in overnight. They came in around 6:00 AM the next morning to remove the bulb. And when they checked me, there was no change. 


Trish: Why did they remove the bulb? I'm 


Kayla: wondering. I, they told me it was gonna be placed for 12 hours. 


I don't know if that is. A lot of times standard 


Trish: or a lot of times we let it stay in until it comes out. Cause it comes out at four centimeters. 


And that was disheartening because one, it was uncomfortable as heck to have that bulb in and then feeling like I was having good contractions and that they were coming consistently. But to have no change, that was disheartening. Disappointed. Yeah. 


Trish: Yeah. Because your body 


Kayla: wasn't ready. And obviously as a hi, I mean in the moment, but definitely as a hindsight thing, I think that was one of the more frustrating things because I think I didn't. 


Need the induction. But so they took the bulb out in the morning and then things were at a standstill. There was, we were, I was waiting for my OB to come in the on-call did a cervical check, and that's how I knew that there was no change. But there was no decision on getting medicine started or when to get medicine started. 


Trish: is so just interjecting. Sure. Is is so manning because you have a unfavorable cervix, which the whole point is get the cervix favorable before you get the uterus contracting. 


Kayla: Yeah it, at one point, the eve the night of the Foley bulb insertion, my, one of my nurses said, asked me, are we supposed to be, are you doing me? And I said, I have no idea. You're like, am I coming up with a pool or, I have no idea. The doctor didn't mention anything about that, but I have no idea. 


Overnight. I don't remember exactly how long, but the order was in, it was supposed to be Pitocin for X amount of hours and then start the miso immediately after it. The, that Pitocin drip finished and then once the miso was finished, I would go on Pitocin again, 


Trish: which I've never, in 16 years of labor and delivery heard. 


Kayla: So labor started on Wednesday night and then stalled. So someone 


Trish: made a mistake. You know that now, right? Yeah. 


Kayla: Oh, for sure. We, that's 


Kayla: My. I don't wanna like disparage all of my l and d team because I did have some really amazing people. 


Yeah. But there was definitely a major disconnect between my nurses and the orders that my doctor was giving in that the nurses were not following the orders that were 


Trish: the nurse who started the Pitocin that first time messed up. Yeah. That's, 


Kayla: That's where And the fact that miso wasn't started the night before. 


So he could have written it, he could have written either one of those, but you would never go cervical ripening, uterine contraction, cervical ripening, uterine contraction. You don't do that. You do cervical ripening prior to uterine contractions. It's put the key in the door, unlock the door, pull the door open, shut the door key, open the door, shut the door key. 


You know what I'm saying? Yeah. You can't open the door until you unlock the door. It makes no sense, 


So again, the Pitocin had, I couldn't feel them. They could see them on the monitor. I guess I was having some contractions. So again, labor was progressing and then stalled. So that, is the second time now that my body is starting the process and then stalled. 


Trish: But had you made any cervical change at all at this 


Kayla: point? 


Yeah. So I, we ended up asking my doctor if we could go home at one point because nothing is happening. My body obviously isn't ready yet. And this is just exhausting. This is emotionally exhausting. 


Trish: Plus you feel like crap cuz you're swollen, you've got the blood pressure stuff going on. Yeah. 


Kayla: My doctor was willing to, he was actually willing to let us go home. He understood where we were coming from. Nothing had changed. Baby's heart rate was doing great. So there was no concerns there. There were some concerns, obviously with my blood pressure. But nothing again, emergent. Yeah. So I had a really tough decision to make. 


I reluctantly said we will just stay. And how they ended up kind about that now Cause I know them. Somewhat now. I definitely wish I had left for sure. I wish I had come home and we'll come 


Trish: back to 


Kayla: that again. Yeah, I definitely wish I had made the decision, yeah. Differently. So the decision was made for me to stay. 


My doctor said, okay, we're gonna pause on any medical intervention, so we're gonna pause on rest. So we're gonna pause on Pitocin so I could try to get some rest I could eat. Cuz obviously on Pitocin they're telling me I can't eat. 


Kayla: Yeah. So I got to get a little bit of a rest and then we started everything all over again on Friday. 


I was give, then I was given things in an order that made more sense. I was given meso and then Pitocin and overnight Friday overnight is when things really started kickstarting. At this point I had, 


Trish: That makes more sense to me that in that order makes a little more sense. 


I still wonder if someone made a little bit of a mess up on the orders. Because it just doesn't make no sense to start Pitocin when your cervix isn't favorable, 


Kayla: yeah. I, it was definitely, I know for sure it was the pit, the Pitocin that we started first. Cuz I remember Yeah. Because it was in my birth plan to have it as low as possible. 


Yeah, no, I, 


Trish: there's no doubt that you're right. I'm just, I'm just wondering. Yeah, 


I was, I opted to do an epidural. Again, it was a hard decision to make because I felt like I had done so much preparation to, to not, or to, to go natural to with, without the epidural. But I was so exhausted and I felt okay, if this can gimme the ability to get some rest to prepare for this, then I'll do it. 


I think the third site ended up being successful. So that was sometime late Friday night. Overnight I was able to get a little bit of rest. At some point I remember the doctor coming in to check me and things were progressing really well, so he felt really confident. Sometime early Saturday morning. 


I got, I had a cervical check. I had, I think I had started getting some nausea, some vomiting. Even with the epidural, I was feeling some strong sensations, contractions, so they called him to do a check, and I was fully dilated and fully efface. I don't remember what station baby was at, but I know that she wasn't like super low. 


Or side laying, or whatever the case may be. I just knew I 100% didn't wanna be on my back. So in my room was Steve and two other labor and delivery nurses. Now obviously with an epidural, I can't 100% feel my cen the sensation of the contraction when one is coming and when it's not. I was relying on my nurses to be monitoring it, on the monitor and say, okay, let's get ready for the next one. 


Yeah. Steve, cuz I'm like, I feel like I need to push, so then Steve is having to get their attention and be like, okay, she feels like she needs to push. I'm 


Trish: getting anxious right now. Yeah. 


I don't think I knew that part. 


Kayla: Yeah. Yeah. They were having side conversations. I What about obviously I don't recall, 


Trish: but shame on you too. 


But 


Kayla: they were not focused and in saying, okay, Kayla, here's another contraction. Get ready to push, get ready to bear down. My, because of the swelling that I had that went. All the way up my legs, my knees, my thighs being on my knees, hands and knees. That probably made it work. Ended up it made it wor Yeah. 


Trish: I ended up having to change what you had all that fluid for so many days. 


Kayla: Yeah. Plus everything they were giving me. The iv, all the medication. Yep. In bed. 


So we changed the position to, I think next I tried sidelining and again, like I'm feeling like I have a contraction coming. I don't know for sure if I am, Steve's holding my leg. The other nurse on the other side should be holding my leg to help me. And he's again, having to corral them and get them to refocus. 


I didn't love side lying at that time, so I wanted to sit up more. So we did the throne position. So they put the bar for me to hold onto and scooted, I scooted to the end of the bed. And that position, I felt like I was able to push like the best because I had that ability to hold that bar. 


I need to lay down. And that's the last thing I remember. I. Wasn't responsive to my nursing team. I closed my eyes, and, they called my doctor in and he was trying to talk to me. He, even the pressure point, like at your cuticle, he was pushing down to try to get some type of a response. 


I was not conscious for my daughter's birth. We didn't know what the gender was. So I didn't know that I was having a girl. I was not conscious for my daughter's birth. I was, I was out. They had given me medication through the spinal tap the I do remember before they pushed that last push of medication. 


I remember contractions and like crying out or moaning out. I remember the feeling of them cutting me, and then that's it. And then I don't remember anything. So I have no photos of me, Steve and Ainsley in the operating room. I didn't get any skin to skin with her in the operating room. 


And our first night in postpartum, WA was tough. I tried breastfeeding. I was still really weak tired. And I think I was in, a haze because I don't really remember a whole lot, but I just, being tired is the big thing. I remember the next day they, you, they're checking in on us the whole time and checking the incision. 


And I think my first sense of what really had happened was I think like that first incision check and, oh, it looks really great. He did such a it looks so good. And I remember thinking to myself like I don't care how good it looks like this wasn't how things were supposed to go. 


I cried making that decision. I page the nurse in, I'll never forget her name. She was amazing. I paged her in and I said, I, we're gonna for start formula feeding. Ainsley, and as I'm telling her this, I'm crying and she's I can see that, that this is a really hard decision for you. 


She's telling me it doesn't matter how you feed your baby. When you walk down the street, do you see someone and say, oh, they're breastfed. Oh, they're formula fed. You've been through something really big. You've been, what you just went through was traumatic. Everybody in labor and delivery and postpartum knew about us, knew what we went through, knew what happened. 


And it was the first time someone said it out loud. And that was big that someone saw that and recognized that. I remember feeling very disconnected from Ainsley. I remember feeling 


Like sevens and I, from what I understand, like a healthy person is 10 and when you're pregnant, they want you to be at like an 11 or 12. So they did blood work and they saw that my hemoglobin was really low and the decision was made to do iron infusions. My blood pressure at the time was still again, something they were monitoring. 


So 


Trish: start that part again. So they, 


Kayla: and at first I wasn't really excited about it. It was scary. The thought of needing to do that. I talked about it with Steve. I even called my mom to get her input and she said, I think it's probably just your best bet. 


I think you just need to do it. So I agreed, to do it. If this is what I'm gonna need to get my energy levels back up and my hemoglobin two a healthy. Stage a healthy level, then I will do that. The one stipulation I had was I didn't wanna see it. I didn't wanna see the blood bag hanging. 


That was a little bit of a disaster. There was four post, there were four nurses in my room, some students in my room trying to figure out how to set up this blood transfusion and how to hide it. And Which in and of itself was a little anxiety inducing. Steve ended up calling my obs office and they he got him on the phone. 


They were like he's out. Or he was like, no, I need to talk to him right now. So he got my doctor on the phone and explained to him what's going on. He's you have a patient who has been through something really intense and she's on anxiety medication and I'm not a person with anxiety. And even watching that was a lot for me. 


So sat there, had my transfusion then they do my blood pressure check and I was like, in one eighties over, it was, I'll never forget the look on my, the nurse's face. She's I'm gonna be right back. I was like, oh gosh, okay. This can't be, that can't be good. That's not a great response. 


And I was gonna be on seizure protocol because when your blood pressure's that high there's that concern. And I remember I just immediately started crying and I even said to him, I'm like, it's just one thing after another. So I get wheeled over to l and d and. All the nurses are like, you're back. 


Now at this point, we've been in the hospital for, I don't know, five days at this point. Six days I pushed the button. Damn it. So then they gave me something else to help my kidneys. Work out all that fluid. And so now I'm up and down to pee every five minutes as if getting in and out of a hospital bed with a abdominal energy incision isn't hard enough. 


But now I'm hooked up to all these things. I get the cuff on my arm that every 10 minutes is checking my blood pressure and the heart and the oxygen monitor. And but the me the medicine did its job. I was getting, I was going to the bathroom to help get, try to get some of that fluid out. 


And I think we were back in labor and delivery for three days total. They had started me on blood pressure medication for a few days and I'm surprised they didn't 


Trish: have a catheter 


Kayla: in you. It was a holding period. We were just waiting to see if my blood pressure would come down with this medication. 


We were the only people there. She was the only baby. So they could take her at night so that Steve and I could get some rest and they would just all take turns holding her and feeding. Yeah. But, it was hard to say the least. I, at one point I sent a text message to my friends and family. 


I still have it on my phone, but because I felt really disconnected and. Not wanting to give all the details or whatnot is just second nature to me. I'm not a hundred percent in terms of asking for help. I'm not always the best at it or and Steve really cur, he's you need to let everyone I've done that know's happening. 


And even, like I said, feeling disconnected to Ainsley. I remember saying to her at one point That. I'm sorry Mommy hasn't told you she loves you yet. But, I eventually got there to say the least. I love her with every single fiber of my being. But what we went through has impacted so so much. 


Trish: I'm so glad you came today. And I just want to, I wanna talk a bit about just your journey since, because when I think about our postpartum healing group in the membership, and particularly you and I can still remember the first out, and I remember you sitting at your kitchen bar and I can remember, I am definitely an empath, number one, and I can remember feeling your pain. 


But what has happened has blown us all away and it really started with that first hangout. And part of that was, your story was Cassie's story was, Liz's story was, I remember Liz sharing how sh you know her feelings of those intrusive thoughts. So I would love for you to kind share just what that has meant to you cuz it's meant so much to me. 


To tell them that, my kid is driving me nuts today. I know that they get it, but in the moment with a baby, with, this little tiny ball of adorable cuteness it might be a little bit different, but to be able to hear these other moms describe these ups and these downs and to be able to feel like you're seen, I think that's one of the biggest things is to be able to feel like you're seen and to appreciate the courage that some of these moms have had to share these really tough, dark moments because it's not sunshine and rainbows. 


As and as we've chatted about that, that therapy journey has been very difficult. But my anxiety and being overwhelmed at times and feeling lonely, and again, to have another mom admit that feeling lonely at times. Trying to put Ainsley down for a nap and finding myself crying because I'm overwhelmed that she's fighting this nap and I'm tired, and and making the decision I, that it was gonna be in my best interest mentally and to be a better mom to start medication, like other moms have shared that already. 


Or, other moms have said that. And I think that feeling of connect being connected to them it's invaluable. I don't think that my journey, I don't think I'd be where I am in my journey if I wasn't able to hop on those calls and share the ups and downs. Yeah. 


Trish: I've, I it has really taken me for surprise. 


I go live inside the community. I try to go quite a bit. I get on there in the morning. These girls are my friends too. Like we hang out. They know I sh I'm very vulnerable. I share my life like I'm real with them. They're real with me. I know what's going on in their lives. They know what's going on in mine. 


We are not postpartum nurses. So the extent of my postpartum nursing is mostly two hours after birth. And then I say bye unless you are high risk and you come back to me like Kayla, and then I put on my high risk nursing. I like it. It's thrilling. I take care of you again and then I ship you back. But what's been really incredible is that I, and I've told Kayla knows this cuz I've told them because it's mind boggling. 


We didn't verbalize it because some of it is embarrassing. And so there's something about us being on something, there's a safety to this co, this Zoom call that we do, that we are able to just be free to talk and share. I don't know, it's just been really cool. And like you and Cassie have become friends outside of labor nurse 


Kayla: model. 


Sharing that struggle and trying to find humor in it. And then just from there, we've just connected and bonded over just different aspects, our journey, the, the stuff our kids are doing, where they're at. And then another mom I've been texting with is Sarah because, there were a few calls where Sarah voiced some struggles that she was having and. 


I saw that, in, in me as well and I remember reaching out to her and just telling her like, Hey, like I get it. I see you. I'm in the thick of that right now as well. And then we've started texting as well and that's been great. I love that so much. 


Trish: I love it so much. And some of my other students, yeah. 


Kayla: Oh yeah. Without a doubt. That 


Trish: is that makes it so worth it cuz you know, Taylor and I pour ourselves into you guys like beyond and that just makes it. 


So worth it to me. Like I love that so much and I love you guys so much. So that just, yeah. That makes me so happy. And we just, we love you guys and we just want, like all these workshops we do, and the hangouts we do it's because we want to invest and I want to change this culture. Like it needs to change, like for Ansley, for my daughters we want it to be different, 


I never in a million years would have envisioned that I would have experienced birth trauma because I never knew really that was a th a thing that could happen. Obviously I know that there were scary things that can happen, but this term birth trauma never really was something I was aware of. 


And I think that we need to start talking about it more. And the one thing I have come to realize is that birth trauma is not the exception. It's the norm. Yeah. And that what you know, which is hard, powerful picture. Perfect births it, it's 


Trish: hard. Yeah. And in my shoes, it's hard, which you do have. 


Listen to me, you need this. Come in here. It's $19 a month, but I promise you need it because you don't know what's coming without scaring the shit out of these new moms. It's I don't know how to say cushion yourself. Get ready. You need us. Come in here before you need us because you need us. 


It's so hard. Yeah. I don't know. 


Because again, I think that lack of knowledge and that lack of awareness around birth trauma being a very prevalent thing. I need to know, who I'm speaking to and if they're gonna understand it, I can connect with Cassie over my birth trauma because Kathy, Cassie suffered her own. But versus trying to explain to my mother-in-law that my birth was traumatic. Like I, she's not gonna really understand. Why, or in what sense or what. But I think to your point, any moms who are pregnant or even are postpartum, the, they need this community for sure, because they don't know what they don't know. 


This is a very, the fact that it was an emer, this situation, it, due to the fact that it was an emergency C-section and I wasn't really able to, Voice. I wasn't conscious, but I think it would be, I think to not say that if I had planned a little bit differently or if I had given more mental space, if to what, if this happens. 


I would've felt more prepared. I, we, I went in with my birth plan and I went in, okay, these are my tools. This is what I'm gonna do for X, Y, Z. But that went out the window. Yeah. Pretty quickly. 


Hello doggie. That's a good No, I'm sorry. We've gone very pretty long. 


Kayla: Oh, okay. 


Trish: I'll finish that and then we'll wrap up here in a second. Okay. 


And just giving yourself some grace, I think would be, like maybe going back a little bit, but even hearing your story like. I even wonder gosh, is there a chance that maybe they weren't monitoring your blood pressure well, and maybe you were seizing what, what was going on with your blood pressure? 


I'm thinking these girls were chatting it up and not paying attention to your contractions. Were they paying attention to your vital signs? Were you preeclamptic? What, what's going? The high risk nurse in me is like my, I'm perking up a little on this story because everything about your signs are very high risk, so I think giving yourself a little bit of grace, this is a pretty unique situation, but the Vback lab side of me is, anyway, I am so glad you came on today. I love you so much. 


Trish: Yes. And we, I've got I've got like a tear. I'm like, the whole time I'm like, are my eyelashes gonna come off? Thank you so much for coming today, Kayla. Thank you. All right. I'm gonna stop it. I'm so glad you came. Oh, mama. I hope you enjoyed today's episode where I chatted with Kayla, one of my calm labor students, all about her birth journey. 


We'll see you next Friday. Bye for now.